When it comes to clothing for tall women, few things give the tall woman a bigger headache than—no, not small, tight-fitting hats—but SHOES.

My mother used to tell me I needed big feet to hold up all my height, because with small, dainty feet I would only tip over and topple to the earth like the ancient Colossus of Rhodes.

If you’re a tall woman, chances are your shoe size goes into double digits.

At some point in your life, you’ve had to buy athletic shoes from the men’s department. You can’t find any pumps long or wide enough for your tall woman’s feet, so you cram them into backless open-toed shoes, and hope no one notices your heels hanging so far off the back edges, that you should probably have little red flags attached to them as a caution to people behind you.

And who can forget Cinderella’s stepsisters? When the prince came knocking in search of the girl with the perfect fit, did the stepsisters’ feet ever get lost in that glass slipper? Of course not. Even fairy tales conspire against women with large feet.

How many times have you gone shopping for shoes, only for the shoe salesman to disappear in the back on a quest to find something in your size? You sit there with one stocking foot stuck out, waiting . . . waiting . . . you tuck your stocking foot back under your chair . . . you wait some more . . . you start to feel silly sitting there with one shoe on . . . still waiting . . .and with each minute that ticks by, your heart sinks another notch lower with the dread that he isn’t going to find the shoe you want in your size. You wait some more while he calls the warehouse on the other side of town.

And even if you do get lucky and find something in your size, more often than not you’re going to have to sacrifice something else—usually color or style.

It’s so frustrating to see so many cute shoes out there, in lots of different colors and fun styles, only to find out they’re not available in a size for tall women. Shorter women with smaller feet stop in their dainty little tracks to swoon over chic footwear in the shop windows, while we tall women continue walking by without breaking our long stride, not even bothering to glance that way because unless it happens to be one of those big and tall clothing stores, we know there’s nothing in that window for us.

For years, many of us have had to make do with whatever we can squeeze our feet into. Fewer choices mean fewer shoes, even if it does free up more closet space. Do our husbands and boyfriends even appreciate the fact that they’re not always tripping over hundreds of women’s shoes every time they go into the closet?

Once again, while searching online for tall women clothing, I looked for shoes designed specifically for tall women’s feet. All is not lost. Some companies and even individual entrepreneurs are starting to notice there’s a market for women’s plus size shoes, and that it’s no little niche, but a big footprint.

If you’re an outdoor girl, LLBean is a great place to look for just about any kind of footwear designed for rugged or athletic outdoor activity, to include boots for hiking through the mountains or just shuffling through the snow. While most of their footwear is available only in one medium width, I did find an acceptable number of shoes and boots in wider widths. They do make it easy for the customer to find those, by adding a little green icon that says “in wider widths.”

I just about went nuts—but in a good way—when I looked at Barefoot Tess. Possibly because of my large feet, I’ve never taken much interest in shoes, but Tess could get me obsessed quite easily. I saw every color and style and design you could think of, and was impressed by the quantity.

Kathryn Kerrigan is not only the name of another site, but she’s a tall woman who decided early on that if no one else was going to make shoes for tall women, she would. Her sizes run up to 15 and 16, with beautiful shoes handcrafted in places like Italy and Spain. My only quibble was with the lack of information concerning width: You have to e-mail them with any questions about the available widths of particular shoes. Every pair of shoes I looked at stated the price was “starting at” such-and-such an amount, hinting that same pair might cost even more under certain circumstances, but I couldn’t find what those circumstances were. The prices remained the same whether the shoe was a size 9 or 15, so it makes me wonder if the prices go up should you need a wider width, and that’s why you must take the extra trouble to find out.

Designer Shoes.com also has a wide variety, and allows you to narrow your search not only according to your shoe size/width, but style, color, height of heel, the works. Like Barefoot Tess, this site could make me shoe crazy.

At all of these sites, the prices come in a wide range from as low as $30.00 up to several hundred dollars. They also have shoes on sale and clearance, so they’re always worth visiting on a frequent basis, because I feel with some diligence and patience, you could get something amazing for a great price.

One more thought about tall women’s shoes: If you want to wear high heels, wear them! If you feel comfortable in high heels—wear them!

How many times have people told you, “You don’t need to wear heels! You’re already tall enough!”

Ask any woman of average or shorter height to look you in the eye without blinking, and tell you the main reason she wears high heels is to make herself look taller. Of course that isn’t why. She wears them because they’re fashionable and she knows she looks good in them.

Ask her why she doesn’t settle for flats. Is it because she’s short enough already? No, because she knows that high heels look better with what she’s wearing. A lot of flats are very cute, especially with those bows and things, but unfortunately, some women think they’re hideous and wouldn’t be caught dead in them.

Yet those same women think they’re okay for us tall women, since we’re already tall enough, so why on earth would we want to be taller?

It’s as if some people think our height is supposed to be an embarrassing liability, when it should be one of our proudest assets.

Personally, I like flats because they’re comfortable with casual wear, but I also like high heels with more dressy outfits—especially those that show a lot of leg—because they do look better, regardless of my height. Also, feet don’t look so big in heels because of the angle.

The late Diana, Princess of Wales, was a tall woman at five foot eleven. During her marriage to Prince Charles, she usually wore flats when appearing in public with him, because she didn’t feel right towering over her husband the future king. She frequently offset the flats with full skirts that fell below the knee. But after her divorce, when she was no longer seen with him, her hemlines went up—and so did her heels. She looked fantastic, and no one fussed about it because of her height.

If she did it, why can’t we? Just as we tall women deserve shoes with the best fit, we also deserve shoes that give us the best look. But whether our heels are high or flat, the important thing is that we FEEL our best.

Do you ever get hassled about heels? Tell us how you deal with it! Or do you still balk at trying them, though you’d like to? Tell us what’s stopping you. What problems have you had finding shoes that not only fit, but are stylish? Share what’s worked for you, and what hasn’t.

And above all, feel free to rant.

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